Important Tips You Should Know Before Protective Styling - Wigs & Bun Edition

 This photo was taken back in February of 09. Literally a few months after starting my healthy hair journey. I began to experiment with protective styling [specifically buns] until I perfected braid outs and twist outs. Because I knew the implications of pulling your hair taught regularly, I decided to braid my hair in about 8 sections, allow to dry overnight, then loosely bun for more of a wavy effect. This saved my hairline and nape from excess tension, and ultimately follicular damage. 
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1. Be mindful of your hairline and nape: Most damage to the hairline, temples and nape area is due to excessive stress from styling. If you wear braids, buns and other hairstyles where the hair is pulled taught, you are susceptible to Traction Alopecia. Traction Alopecia stems from follicular damage and depending on the extent can be permanent [as follicles are not able to regenerate themselves]. 

• If you are wearing buns as a protective style, switch up the placement of your bun. A high bun one day, a low chic bun the next, and so forth. The goal is to reduce tension in the same areas and relive stress placed on the follicles. 
• Again, for bun wearers; switch up the parts. If you part your hair in the same area over time, you may notice thinning in that area. Alternate the placement of parts to alleviate stress placed on the follicles.
•  Avoid excessively tight hairstyles for long periods of time. Sure there are some people that can retain length and thickness by wearing buns excessively for years. However this isn't the case for most of us. In the US, African American women have the highest rates of Traction Alopecia due to our styling preferences. Experiment with other protective styling options from time like loose pony's and even two-strand twists fashioned into a chic updo. Your hair will thank you! 
• Do not sleep in tight buns or ponytails. Allow your scalp to breath and relieve stress placed on the follicles. Let your hair down, and give yourself a scalp massage to increase circulation to your scalp. The circulation feeds your follicles and promotes hair growth.  

2. For those wearing wigs as a protective style: Don't forget to moisturize. This is extremely important as breakage and brittle hair can go hand in hand with styles that cover up the scalp. This is so because hairstyles like weaves and wigs prevents the absorption of moisture and decreases ability for the scalp to breathe. The key to having healthy hair is keeping your scalp healthy. The main components of a healthy scalp are: cleansing, moisturizing, circulation, and preventing excess stress.

• Weekly shampoo and deep conditioning treatments are still necessary.

• Alternate between wigs, half wigs, and phony-ponys to reduce the amount of time your scalp is covered. 

• Implement regular exfoliation treatments [more info and a recipe can be found here], as the lack of moisture and air can trigger inflammation of the scalp which could later lead to hair loss and thinning. In fact, scalp inflammation is the #1 cause of hair loss in women. 

• Ditch the stocking cap and opt for a silk scarf instead. A stocking cap can cause breakage around the hairline and nape due to friction

• Moisturize the hair at least once daily, as wigs tend to suck the moisture right out of your tresses. 

• Be extremely careful of the placement of combs attached to half wigs and combs, as the digging/friction can cause hair loss as well. Try to stick the combs in the silk scarf so that only a small portion of the comb is attached to your hair. This will help minimize friction.

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Giveaway Winner + Product Recommendations For Transitioners

 [Photography by: Ajani Truth - Styling: Kia Chenelle]

First I would like to announce the winner of the Rachel Stewart Giveaway! *Drumroll Please* YaHighness 
Please contact me at: nikole@themoptopmaven.com with your mailing address to claim your prize! - A big thank you to Rachel of Rachel Stewart Jewelry for hosting, and everyone who entered!

Also, I am doing a series of posts [Guest Blogging] for Wedding Soiree! A fabulous wedding site founded by a group of premier wedding planners in Atlanta. Check them out, and check out my newest post: The Four Week Wedding Boot Camp Your Hair Will Thank You For - I hope this comes in handy for any bride to be out there!

---------------------- Now On To The Deets

The needs of relaxed and transitioning hair is different from the needs of hair that is natural. This is due in part to the structure of the hair. Hair that has been chemically treated is susceptible to a bevy of issues; most notably keratin loss, cuticle damage, and hair that is overly porous. Due to these changes in the structure of the hair, some products formulated for natural hair may leave your relaxed or transitioning hair with less than desirable results [sticky, stiff, matted, dry]. Because of this, I decided to comprise a short but useful list of products to ease your transition period.

Co-Washing Conditioner

Some of you may already be familiar with the term co-washing. For those that aren't, co-washing is a method of cleansing the hair without using shampoo. Shampoo on the relaxed portion of your hair could cause excess tangles, matting, and dryness. Because of this, a conditioner is used in lieu of shampoo to gently cleanse the scalp while imparting moisture to thirsty strands. How often you co-wash depends on the state of your hair [is it fine and oily or thick and dense?]. Some transitioners opt to co-wash every other day [I co-washed every 3-days] which can get expensive if you are using moderately priced conditioners.

Stocking up on inexpensive yet effective brands can save money in your pocket, as well as ease some of your transitioning woes. - My favorite co-washing conditioner [and the favorite of many transitioners] is V05 Strawberries & Cream Moisture Milks - For $1.00 a bottle [and less in many stores], you can stock up on an effective co-wash conditioner without the guilt.

Shampoo

I recommend using an actual shampoo about twice a month while transitioning. This is because the agents from the conditioner can cause buildup on your tresses. As we know, buildup can create a barrier along the hair shaft locking moisture out, which makes for dry, stiff and brittle hair. This is the last thing you want whilst transitioning, as the line of demarcation [where your relaxed hair and natural hair meets] is very delicate and prone to breakage if not properly moisturized. However it doesn't stop there, for best results seek out a shampoo that is sulfate free, this is a lot better for your transitioning hair as it gently cleanses your strands without stripping it of it's natural oils. 

As you can see, the underlying theme here is moisture. You need to keep your transitioned hair as moisturized as possible to prevent unnecessary breakage. I highly recommend Elucence Moisture Benefits Shampoo.

Shampoo Tip: Focus on the scalp while shampooing. The scalp and new growth tends to have a lot more oil versus the relaxed hair which has a tendency to be a little on the dry side. As the water rinses away the shampoo, it will gently cleanse the shaft of the hair as well. Lightly agitate the shaft of the hair while rinsing to distribute shampoo. 

Condition:

You can opt to use your co-washing conditioner, which is great if you want to simplify the amount of products in rotation. Or you can choose another conditioner which is a bit more moisturizing; my favorite for transitioning hair is Aussie Moist. It does a wonderful job at delivering moisture to your new growth making it soft, moisturized and easy to manage. Aussie Moist also hydrates your relaxed hair and improves combability which is a major plus.

Deep Conditioner:

Deep conditioning treatments are essential to every effective total regimen. I have a lot of relaxed & transitioning friends who swear by Aubrey Organics Honeysuckle Rose. So much so, that I decided to give it a try as well [review soon!]. Honeysuckle Rose is extremely thick  and ultra hydrating which is a no-brainer that I would recommend this as the deep conditioner of choice. Use this product once weekly with heat to intensify the moisturizing benefits. 

Protein Treatment: 

One of the single most important products you will buy [aside from a moisturizer] is a protein treatment. This will fortify the hair near the line of demarcation which helps prevent breakage. The line of demarcation has a tendency to be more fragile than the rest of your hair, and can break-off just from combing and styling alike. Protein treatments helps replenish protein lost from chemical and thermal services. After a protein treatment, your hair will temporarily mimic that of healthy hair [at least until you need another treatment]. A good protein treatment would be the Aphogee 2 minute product. It's tried and true, and strong enough for to properly fortify your relaxed hair.

Leave-In Conditioner:

Keeping with our theme of moisture, it's imperative to have a hydrating leave-in. Again, for those wishing to simply and save on cash, you can use your regular conditioner as a leave-in. A word of caution if you do this, go easy on the product. Too much could easily cause a white filmy residue on your strands leaving you with hair that lacks body and attracts dirt. My absolute favorite leave-in for relaxed hair is Rusk Smoother, Passionflower and Aloe Leave-In. This product is light enough to wear under free flowing styles [like braid outs and twist outs], yet hydrating enough to leave your hair touchably soft and manageable.

Moisturizer:

This is the product you can use in between co-washing & shampoo sessions to make managing your hair on a day-to-day basis a lot easier. While moisturizers obviously impart moisture to your strands, they can also help prevent breakage and splitting from mechanical damage [mechanical damage= Damage due to combing, brushing and excess manipulation] by easing manageability. It may sound strange, but one of my favorite moisturizers to use on transtioning hair is S-Curl Curl Activator. I promise you won't look like Darryl from Coming To America. It hydrates your relaxed hair without leaving it gummy, sticky and hard like a lot of moisturizers formulated for natural hair tends to do. S-Curl Curl Activator will leave your new growth soft, shiny, manageable and ultra moisturized along with the relaxed section of your hair.

Oil: 

In order to keep your hair hydrated longer, reach for an oil to seal in the moisture. Oil creates a barrier on the hair shaft which greatly improves moisture retention. Jojoba Oil is a wonderful choice for both transitioners and natural's alike, as it is light enough for daily use and it most closely resembles the structure of sebum [the oil your body produces to nourish and lubricate your skin/hair] .

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Self Forgiveness

Hi Everyone, How are ya, I'm doing pretty good. One of the most important issues my counselor and I agree on with me is that I need to learn to forgive myself. I have been carrying around a lot of self blame in my baggage since childhood. It went full bloom when my mother had her double stroke. She had been sick the week before and I wanted to call an ambulance, but I spoke with my sister and at the time she did not think it was necessary, but deep down I did, she seemed disorientated and had a little trouble walking. Being a nurse I trusted her judgement and I am sure she called it right, but that little bit of doubt, that voice inside my head, haunted me the whole time I watched her suffer from the effects of the double stroke and still does. I was told there was nothing we could have done to prevent the double stroke, but even then I still believed if I had gotten her to a hospital I could have saved her from that fate. Then my worst fear of all happened, which magnified my guilt, she died when I was not there. Even though I was there that day and I did lay in bed with her and hold her as I whispered in her ear what a beautiful women she was and how happy I was that she was my mother, I still kept insisting I needed to be with her when she took her last breath. To make a long story short, as much as I was there that day to avoid that fear, I could not control fate. I realize now that she must of wanted to be alone when she passed, because she hung on for hours after she should have and until all of her children had left the room. So jump to today, no longer can I hide my feelings from myself that I chose to do so with Alcohol. And thanks to the help of my counselor she reminds me that I did the best I could, I did take good care of her and her suffering was not my fault. I need to let it go and begin working on self forgiveness. If not I will continue to stay in a painful place. So as I am working on this, for many other things I did wrong that may have hurt others and myself as well, I thought I would share some material I have found to help myself in the hope that it helps any of you who have the same issues or baggage. Although it's a process, some days tougher than others, in time we will set ourselves free to fully live life the way we are meant to, and especially the way our loved ones would want us too.
Thank you for visiting my blog,
Love you,
Janet :)

In our journey to inner peace and healing, both guilt and forgiveness of self and others have a profound effect on this process. Guilt is defined as a feeling of culpability especially for imagined offences or from a sense of inadequacy; a self-reproach; and forgiveness as the act of forgiving or the ceasing of feeling resentment against an offender. Guilt and lack of forgiveness of self and others, burdens many people with the heavy weight of inappropriate shame and the destruction of deep-seated resentments. In recent years, much has been written about the destructiveness of repressed emotions and particularly anger and resentment in contributing to life-threatening illnesses.

The belief that feeling emotion means we are weak is a dreadful legacy to burden people with. Teaching people that strength means not feeling or denying our feelings is tantamount to creating illness. Beliefs such as 'big boys don't cry' and 'good girls don't get angry' has resulted in men and women who are unable to get in touch with what they actually feel. Depression is thought to be caused by anger turned inward and is only one of the symptoms of the need to protect ourselves from the scorn associated with expressing feelings. Many other illnesses and particularly the addictions are theorised to be expressions of a deep level of emotional pain.

Why won't we forgive? I believe it starts from our unwillingness to forgive ourselves. We believe that we are undeserving of love, respect, acceptance, appreciation, and the right to live a life where we walk in peace, joy, harmony, and abundance. Somewhere along the line, we started to believe that all the rules and regulations of the society in which we live defined who we were supposed to be. We stopped trusting and believing in our own inherent worth and came to believe that we were 'not good enough.' Messages such as 'you failed' or 'you should' became a litany for us to abuse ourselves with guilt. I call it abuse because it is just as painful when we do it to ourselves as when others do it to us. We became judge and jury and found ourselves guilty of our perceived offences. When the primary caregivers such as parents, teachers, and other societal influences are unable to love themselves unconditionally, this 'learned attitude' is passed on to the next generation as shame in an attempt to control behaviour.

This sense of shame differs from guilt in that guilt is about behaviour. Shame is deeper and more pervasive. It is about your being and feelings of inferiority, inadequacy, being bad and unlovable become the conviction underlying your life. Children grow up believing they are 'not good enough' and become the caregivers for the next generation. And so it goes, on and on. I am not blaming the parents and caregivers here as we parent the way we were parented. My own definition of maturity is that maturity is achieved when we are able to forgive our parents and other significant adults for being human.

What Is Self-forgiveness?

Self-forgiveness is the willingness to believe that you are worthy, that there are no mistakes rather, you are on the planet, or in Earth School (as some people call it) to learn about being human. The opportunities to learn are just that - not mistakes - just opportunities to learn.

Practical Steps to Self-forgiveness

* Examine how you perceived a certain situation and how you can chose to change your perception. Remember that the thoughts we think create the feelings, and it is our perception that creates our interpretations of the situation.

* Accept yourself and your humanness - you are not supposed to be perfect.

* Admit when you make a mistake.

* Remember that everybody is doing the best they can with what they know, and that includes you.

* Let go of past-future thinking, stay in the 'Now.'

* Confront your emotional pain - own your own 'stuff.'

* Appreciate the lessons that have contributed to your growth and made you who you are now.

* Say 'I forgive myself for ____________ (whatever).'

Written by Armen Hareyan on 2006-02-04

Fashion & Beauty Ethos: Flawless Foundation Tutorial >> Video

This tutorial demonstrates how to achieve a flawless finish using a MAC 187 stippling brush and Revlon Colorstay. I have different techniques for sheer coverage, as well as mineral makeup applications that I will share with you over the next few weeks. This is my technique for medium to full coverage foundation application. 

Step One: Prep face with rosewater, as it helps to tone skin and offers a healthy glow. Allow water to sit on face for 15 minutes so that your skin fully absorbs the moisture and properties of the rosewater. 

Rosewater can be found in most ethnic grocery stores.

Step Two: Apply moisturizer and allow the moisturizer to set for about 15-30 minutes. Again, this allows your skin to fully absorb the moisturizing properties and nutrients in the moisturizer. I like using heavy moisturizers under my foundation as it keeps my face soft, smooth, hydrated and glowing.    

Step Three: Apply makeup primer, my favorite is MAC Prep & Prime. Primer helps your foundation better adhere to your skin, and also helps it stay put. It also helps minimize large pores [temporarily of course] and fills in wrinkles to give the skin a youthful, even glow. Make sure to apply a nice thin even layer all over your skin; don't forget your jawline and neck area. 

 Step Four: Add a small amount of foundation to the back of your hand, stipple and swirl the brush in the foundation to warm up the foundation a bit. Warming the foundation helps it to blend in better with your skin lending more of a natural appearance. 

Step Five: Begin to lightly stipple the makeup all over your face with your foundation brush. Stippling lends to the flawless, velvety, airbrushed finish. It's ok to apply more foundation to your brush as needed. - Use more foundation in the areas where you need more coverage [dark spots, circles etc].

Step Six: Begin to lightly buff out your foundation to even out your coverage and blend out any dots or lines from stippling. This ensures a warm seamless finish. You don't need to apply a lot of pressure, a light sweeping motion will do the trick.

Step Seven: You may notice your skin is now all one color. It's time to add a little depth and dimension to your skin for more of a natural appearance. I like to use Mineralize Skin Finish by Mac for this purpose. Apply the powder with a powder brush; my brush of choice is the 150 by MAC. 

Step Eight: To save all of your hard work from going down the drain, set your makeup with a translucent powder. Cover FX makes a great translucent powder for women of color, if you find that regular powders lend an ashy look to your brown skin, give Cover Fx a try! - I apply this powder in a gentle patting motion.

Step Nine: Set your makeup with Fix Plus spray by MAC. This is favorite of mine and lends a radiant lightly dewy glow!

Tools Used:

• Rosewater - Can be found in most health food, and ethnic grocery stores
• Cetaphil Moisturizer - Available in most drugstores like CVS, Walgreens and larger stores like Target and Wal-Mart 
• Revlon Colorstay [color 44] - The perfect inexpensive foundation for Oily/Combination skin [they have various formulations from normal -dry] that offers seamless buildable coverage. You can go from medium to heavy coverage with this product.
• Mineralize Skin Finish [deep dark] - Adds a nice glow, and creamy finish to your skin. This product can be found in all places MAC makeup is sold
• MAC Fix Plus - Sets the makeup which helps it last a lot longer. It also adds a bit of a radiant glow. - Again, this product can be found in all places MAC makeup is sold. 
• Cover FX Translucent Powder -  The perfect lightweight powder to set makeup, extend the wear of the foundation, and offer a silky smooth, velvety finish.

Instant Funk: Has Your Style of Dress Changed Since Going Natural?

 [source]

One thing I noticed after I started to embrace my curly mane, is that my selection of clothes became a bit less conservative. While I still lean towards conservative pieces from time to time, wild prints, bold colors, and statement jewelry ran away with my heart. 

I love admiring real people with real style. While I still have fun flipping through the pages of magazines, I find admiring real people more entertaining as they aren't manufactured by editors, stylists and clothing houses to steer you towards trends and designers of the moment. It's more authentic this way. 

Here are a few of my favorite photos of fierce naturals. Have you noticed your style has changed since becoming natural? 

I love bold colors and maxi-dresses with eye-catching patterns!

Cutoff shorts coupled with boots always lends a funky edge to any outfit!

My new favorite vice; color-play. Pair unsuspecting colors together, this helps recycle pieces and gives any outfit more of a highly stylized feel.  

Funky shoes can dress up the most basic outfit!

Experiment with different silhouettes!

While Tracee Ellis Ross is a celeb, I definitely think she has real style. - Over-the-knee skirts and dresses are ultra feminine and sexy! Keep the silhouette clean and slightly fitted to avoid drowning in your garments.

Pattern play is also pretty fun, plus it allows you to get dressed without the hassle of having to match every single piece down to the nail polish. Keep it simple and mix no more than two patterns at a time. A shirt and bag [as demonstrated in this photo] is a good starting point. 

Last but not least, grab a funky friend! 

[photo source]

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All About Hair: Calling All Curls! 5 Quick Tips To Enhancing Your Natural Curl Pattern

[source]

[1] Use a microfiber towel or thick t-shirt to dry your hair. Remember to squeeze gently not rub in order to preserve your natural curl pattern and prevent frizz.

[2] Use COLD water when styling. Cold water seals the cuticles and makes for shiny, more manageable hair. If you need to rehydrate your hair while styling it into a wash and go set; drop a couple of ice cubes in a spray bottle filled with cold water and use it to spritz your hair. 

Additionally, you may add a half-teaspoon of Apple Cider Vinegar to your ice water spritz. This is exceptionally useful for those with very thick, coarse highly textured hair as it makes the hair more manageable and helps coils "clump" together/ 

[3] Excessive manipulation while your hair is damp can disrupt the curl pattern causing frizz and curls that are nonuniform-ed. Instead, manipulate hair while soaking wet [using your ice-water spray mixture to rehydrate when necessary] to prevent excess frizz.

[4] Invest in a Denman brush! Something about this brush brings out the best in most curls, kinks and coils. Remember to thoroughly detangle hair prior to using your Denman to eliminate mechanical damage from brushing tangled hair while wet. 

My new method goes something like this: spray wet hair with ice water + "smooth" a 2 inch section of hair by brushing it with a denman. Add gel or curling custard/pudding of choice. Then spritz again with cold water to encourage curls to "clump". This prevents stringy singular curls and enhances thicker more uniform curls. 

[5] Use a shampoo specifically formulated for curly hair. This makes a big difference in the outcome of your wash and go. Especially if it takes a bit of work bringing out your curl pattern like me. I recommend Carol's Daughter Hair Milk Curl Perfecting Shampoo or Herbal Essence Totally Twisted Shampoo; as both are formulated with the needs of curly hair in mind.

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All About Hair: September's Top Five Under Five

[source]

I am always looking for the next best thing. Not necessarily because I am unsatisfied with the performance of my products, but because I want to provide all of you out there with options. Options are a good thing. So is walking into a store with a recommendation in hand versus staring at a bevy of hair products all promising the same thing. 

We're almost halfway through September yet I have stumbled across a few products worthy of mention and most importantly recessionista friendly. Because really, who wants to spend a third of their earnings on hair products? 

Herbal Essence Hello Hydration Conditioner [$3.99]: This conditioner packs a moisture punch comparable to higher priced conditioners, yet at a fraction of the cost. Hello Hydration is moisturizing enough to be used without heat, however it also makes a wonderful deep conditioning treatment with the addition of steam or a heating cap.

Hello Hydration leaves my strands moisturized, soft, and ultra manageable. For $3.99 I would say this product is a steal.

Herbal Essence Totally Twisted Conditioner [$3.99]: This is new to my styling arsenal but I love it nonetheless. It is formulated specifically to address the needs of thick hair which means it is filled with ingredients to hydrate thirsty hair. This conditioner also makes a wonderful leave-in as well [when used sparingly].

Herbal Essence Long Term Relationship Leave-In [$3.99]: Yet another Herbal Essence product. I haven't tried an H.E product that I didn't like; and I hope I continue my winning streak with this brand. This is a thick [it's so thick I have to take off the top to dispense it], creamy leave-in that leaves your hair soft, shiny, and residue free.

If you already have a favorite leave-in yet you want a standby that is cheap and easily accessible, consider this product. If you're leave-in has a hard time keeping your strands moisturized under products like gels, and curl creams; Herbal Essence Long Term Relationship is a great option.

VO5 Moisture Milks Conditioner [Strawberry & Creme - $.99]: I purchased this product out of sheer curiosity [It was on sale for .69 cents], and it really blew me away. Granted I recommend leaving it on for at least 20-30 minutes for it to really hydrate the hair, but for under a dollar you really can't beat it. 

For those with thick hair that go through a ton of conditioner, or those that are looking for more of an economical yet effective conditioner, give VO5 Moisture Milks a try. You can literally buy five for the price of one economic conditioner and not feel like you have to ration the product. - This also makes a wonderful co-wash for naturals and transitioners alike.  

ORS Replenishing Pak [$1.29] : I love this product for a few reasons; It's easily accessible, inexpensive and it leaves my hair ridiculously soft and manageable. I usually leave it on for about an hour [without heat], before rinsing with cold water, and a comb could just glide through my hair like butter. 

If you are looking for a consistent and inexpensive deep conditioning treatment; give Olive Oil Root Stimulator Replenishing Pak a try. 

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